Ah, the lazy days of summer! Time to catch up on reading, go to the beach and learn from the most educational experience you can have at home: watching TV. Yes, this is just a setup for:
The Top 10 Lessons I’ve Learned from Watching TV This Summer
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10. There are 3200 tigers left in the wild, but for $8 a month, you can adopt one.
9. “Hamburger Helper” is an Italian food.
8. According to a Pet Smart commercial, dog and cat owners are now called “pet parents”.
7. All you need to do, to get a party started, is open a box of Ritz crackers.
6. If you open a bottle of Bud Light beer, or spray on some Axe, women will fall from the sky and hunt you down through supermarket aisles.
5. It only takes 30 minutes to build a house, prepare a four-course meal and fix a family crisis that would normally take years and thousands of dollars in therapy bills
4. Moms now urge kids to get dirty and slide downhill head first, because they have Clorox to clean their clothes.
3. It is perfectly acceptable to pass gas and chew gas tablets during job interviews.
2. Air spray bottles detect when a room stinks automatically, and spray themselves so.
And the #1 Lesson I’ve Learned from Watching TV This Summer is:
1. Summer days are sunnier, children and single parents play out together, and even Mom goes skinny-dipping, when you drink Sunny D.
Approve? Disapprove? Debate? Feel free to leave me your comments and pass this along!
P.S. I forgot – a bonus one!
0. In just two hours, you can have a noticeably whiter smile that lasts for two months!
